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Awesome Frequently Asked Questions about Jurassic World

I’m at work on something right now, but in the meantime, I went to see Jurassic World. Which was fun, especially because it turned out to be a very crowded movie theater, which meant we had to sit in the third row of the theater. You know how you go to a lot of these 3D movies and the 3D doesn’t really add much to the experience if it’s not IMAX? Sometimes I don’t even go to the 3D version because it’s more expensive and really not worth it. But if you sit in like the third or fourth row? Much more effective 3D experience. Things really do jump out at you, which when you are watching a bunch of rampaging dinosaurs, is kind of neat. Stiff neck at the end, but neat.

Jurassic World was nowhere near as awful as Prometheus, Avatar and the utterly horrible The Expendables 2. It had some very funny moments and great action. The CGI and animatronix dinosaurs are still not quite real looking, but they are getting closer with each movie and they did it pretty effectively here. The actors, including the young ones, gave the best performances they could despite the awful script. Howard went for a total 1980’s look, which allows for discussions of retro fashion. There is an utterly horrible death of a minor character that goes on for a horribly long time, but is, gore aside, unquestionably a really creative death. There are many little tribute details to the first Jurassic Park movie, which reminds you that Jurassic Park, for its occasional faults, was a way better movie. And the movie did make me desperately want a robot raptor doll.

And Jake Johnson is in the movie and almost manages to save half of it. He should star in the inevitable sequel (because this movie has already hit a billion dollars.)

For a much better take on the movie than I could give you, here’s io9‘s article by Rob Bricken, entitled, “Jurassic World: The Spoiler FAQ.” It is awesome and sums up the movie nicely.


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Gender Silliness and SFF

So this Sunday marks the debut of the first episode of Game of Thrones, the HBO t.v. series adaptation of George R.R. Martin’s alternate world fantasy series, Song of Ice and Fire. Song is a favorite of mine, a spin-off look at the War of the Roses combined with a zombie invasion tale. It has a little of everything in it, with brilliantly done points of view, and I would have up until recently assumed that it was the sort of story that would never be made into film or t.v. But times change, and so they are bringing this vast story to life and all bits and clips so far indicate that it’s going to be pretty good. It will also be a template for what may be possible for fantasy fiction in the future in the dramatic mediums.

But girls, according to folk who pay selective if any attention to the world around them, are not supposed to like cool things, something I’ve been told all my life — and yet curiously ignored. And so the New York Times reviewer, a woman, roundly denounced Game as throwing in some romance porn for the ladies, most of whom would otherwise flee, to allow guys to go and enjoy their cool stuff (which curiously does not apparently include porn.) This bizarre review, which made almost no mention of the show whatsoever, was accompanied by another one in Slate magazine online, which also didn’t really talk about the show and instead had the reviewer, a guy, talk about how awful he thinks all forms of fantasy are. But it’s the New York Times one that really has everyone up in arms, because in 2011, after Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel, Supernatural, Smallville, Heroes, Dead Zone, Firefly, Battlestar Galactica, Lost, Charmed, True Blood, Vampire Diaries, the legendary Doctor Who, etc., not to mention times past — Bewitched, I Dream of Jeanie, The Wild Wild West, The Avengers, Lost in Space, The Flying Nun, Nightstalker, Twilight Zone, Outer Limits, The Addams Family, The Munsters, Fantasy Island, Wonder Woman, Highway to Heaven, Beauty and the Beast, Hercules, Xena, Sabrina the Teenage Witch, etc.  — to declare SFF a guy thing when it’s your job to watch t.v. for a living is basically having your head up your ass. Not to mention virulently anti-feminist.

Of course, what the reviewer meant was that the D&D fantasy stuff — what she imagines that to be — is the guy stuff. Things like Charmed, where three sisters worried about their love lives while kicking ass with spells to save the world, that’s not the same thing as lots of political skullduggery and women and men running around with swords. Girls can play house, but not soldier, and definitely not against a dragon. Oddly enough, you run into this attitude a fair amount among hardcore fantasy fans as well. They might agree that Games is really all theirs.  And just like always, millions of women will ignore them.

Here’s the article, if you want to read something strange, and below is the response that I’ve found to be the funniest so far, from io9.



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